I couldn't sleep Tuesday night because all I could think about was how unhappy I am.
Okay, let me backtrack on that a little bit. My life is not terrible right now. I just moved into a new place over the summer that Thomas and I love, school is promising to be pretty easy this semester and I have an adorable pug-baby named Olive. I stay very busy, and a little stressed out, but that's not the issue.
It's the weight.
Needless to say I have not kept up the weight loss since the last time I posted on here, almost a year ago. I would go back on, then off, then on again, then off again. Might lose ten pounds, then gain it all back plus some, then freak out about it, and lose another ten pounds, then stop caring because for some reason eating crap seemed more important than being healthy.
Right now, I feel disgusted whenever I look in the mirror. I feel like my clothes don't fit anymore, which I can't figure out if that is psychological or not because most of my clothes I bought when I was heavier. Maybe they have shrunk over time, I don't know.
But anyway, when I finally went to sleep and woke up Wednesday morning, I was determined to do this again - with the blog and everything, just not the way I did it before. I am not doing daily numbers - or even counting calories. Why? That shit is exhausting. I don't have time for it. I know what is healthy and what isn't, so I am not going to keep track of every little number. I am just going to write about my experience on this "journey" (people always call it that and it sounds so cheesy) and hopefully others will find it relate-able or at least interesting.
So, what's the plan of action this time? The only plan of action that WORKS: eating healthy and exercise! I've recently become interested in belly dancing, then of course there's walking (especially with the pup) and we've got an exercise bike (given to us by the in-laws) in our spare bedroom. Hopefully, all of these things in conjunction will result in success for me. I JUST HAVE TO STICK WITH IT.
P.S. - I know a lot of people have had success with Weight Watchers, and I think that is fantastic. I am not going to join, however, and I have a personal reason for this. If you would like to know, feel free to ask me, but it's not something I want to share with the world.
So glad to hear from you on here again! I went on a weight loss kick - lost about 30 pounds within 2 or 3 months, and I actually did it the healthy way - didn't starve myself or work out obsessively. But, then I became a little lax(what with a new relationship and all), so... maybe hearing someone else getting back on the wagon will help motivate me to lose the rest of the weight I'd wanted to lose to begin with. Keep it up! Much love and encouragement. You're beautiful, regardless. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you for the encouragement, Stephanie! I really appreciate it. And I'm glad to hear you are taking a healthy approach to weight loss, as well! 30 lbs. is no small accomplishment. I understand about getting lax when being in a relationship - Thomas and I both put on weight after we moved in together. It's easy when you're happy and you're in love and you don't care about much else, lol. Plus going out to eat or staying home and eating junk food while watching a movie or TV is so freakin' fun! I don't plan on cutting that out of my life completely, just seriously limiting it.
ReplyDeleteGo, you!!! I'm right there with you. I realized a few days ago that I'm seriously at risk of needing knee replacement in 15-20 years at the most if I don't do something about my weight. Now. I don't eat too badly, but I HAVE to exercise if I want anything to change. So now I just have to find something physical I like doing enough for it to become a habit..... And I'm happy to see you taking care of yourself! It's all about choosing to be healthy and feel good, one choice at a time.
ReplyDeleteyay Lacy! :)
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